I just witnessed something horrifying.
A dude walked into the computer lab with lunch…which consisted of:
a sleeve of rice cakes…and a can of Manwich sauce.
I’ll pause here and give you time to retch.
One by one, he would break up the rice cakes, styrofoam-like puffy rice all over the keyboards, and dunk a wedge into the Manwich can. And then shove the saucey, crunchy mess into his waiting rice-cake-hole.
I am so horrified by this mental image that I’m working a new phrase into my lexicon.
From this moment on, the combination of a can of Manwich and a sleeve of rice cakes shall be a euphemism for terrible, TERRIBLE things.
“That outfit is worse than a can of Manwich and a sleeve of rice cakes.”
“Today is turning into a Manwich and rice cakes kind of day.”
“Shut your waiting rice-cake-hole!”