When I was pregnant (which thankfully seems like FOREVER ago), I switched from coffee to hot tea but still used my coffee mug to drink it. It was a cheap black and tan mug that looked vaguely like bamboo on the outside. Not really the girliest mug, but I’m not much of a girly-girl anyway. (Despite what you say! I know you’re reading this. You know who you are.)
I used this mug EVERY DAY. I would wash it in the kitchen and leave it on my desk so that no one else would grab it for their coffee in the morning before I staggered in. For some reason, people tend to use my coffee mugs if I leave them in the dishwasher at work. Maybe I have excellent taste??
I once found the shape of a skull in the foam from my hot tea while using this mug. True story.
Anyway, when I left for maternity leave, I left my coffee mug in the kitchen. I figured it would be safe and would be there when I got back two months later.
I was young and naive.
When I went back to work, one of the first things I did was go look for my mug to make coffee. It wasn’t on my desk. It wasn’t in the dishwasher. It wasn’t in any of the cabinets. It wasn’t in the executive kitchen upstairs. I had to settle for an ugly flowery community mug that the crazy lady on the other side of the building probably drank out of.
I spent the entire day giving everyone the stink-eye, wondering who had thieved it. It took three days before I finally saw someone walking past holding my mug.
It was my boss. And he was eating oatmeal out of it.
My son is going to be 4 at the end of this year. My boss STILL uses
my that coffee mug.
I had two people suggest today that I should LIBERATE the coffee mug. That it is my duty to right the wrongs of all those who have lost personal items at work.
My boss is out today. And the office is currently empty.
First I tried the kitchen. I checked the cabinets, dishwasher, even climbed onto the countertops so I could make sure I wasn’t missing it.
Then I went to his office. Since I’m the Network Admin, it’s not highly suspicious of me to be in there, even if someone were around to see, but still I was nervous. I could lose my freaking JOB if someone happened to see me going through his desk. I checked under and around the desk, file cabinets, mini-fridge (he’s got a freaking MINI-FRIDGE??) and still nothing.
HE TAKES IT HOME.
My boss is smarter than I am. Dammit.