My Sister’s Hands Freak Me Out

My only sister is three and a half years younger than I am. The last time we lived in the same house, I was 18 and she was 14, so she was still pretty much a kid.

For various reasons, we haven’t spent a lot of time together as adults. For one thing, she’s an aspiring world-traveler and I’m firmly rooted in one city. However, she’s planning to move back to Florida in the very near future and so was in town and available to hang out for New Year’s.

We had a great time. She has a small mix-breed dog that is arguably the most well-behaved, sweet-tempered dog on EARTH. My son loved her and he’s pretty much afraid of everything and everyone right now.

The only weird part?

She has adult hands.

It’s like an episode of Seinfeld. I was sitting on the couch with her, watching her play with and talk about her dog. But I couldn’t keep from staring at her hands. It’s like they’re CGI hands or something. It’s BIZARRE.

Occasionally I get the sensation that I’m participating in a world-wide experiment a la The Truman Show. This was one of those moments. I can imagine that my sister is a life-long actress who lost her original hands in a tragic accident (hopefully doing something awesome like slalom-skiing or BMX trick riding) and who now has highly advanced prosthetic hands that make use of some technology that I’m unaware of in my limited world. Like the real world outside The Christy Show has amazingly advanced technology but I’m relegated to living in a past era that everyone can tune into and observe how I react, interact and go about my daily life.

Crazy? Perhaps. But her hands still freak me out for no apparent reason.

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4 Responses to My Sister’s Hands Freak Me Out

  1. Jim McCabe says:

    Pics, please. Preferably topless.

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  2. James Hussey says:

    Hilarious – man hands, I think it was, in Seinfeld (I forget how to spell it, but yes I watched it). My 17 y/o will be 18 in a few months, her next-in-line sibling is 14. Funny you mentioned that age gap.

    Also reminded of how one of our best friends, my wife’s closest friend, has man hands (and she knows it/hates it). The only reason why I even noticed was her complaints about them – after which point I couldn’t help but notice.

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  3. Insomniac #4 says:

    I won’t ask for topless pics (lmao Jim!) but I was sort of expecting a comparison pic of your hands vs. your sister’s. Lol…funny you should mention “man hands” though: this girl that I had a HUGE crush on in college was in a commercial for Microsoft a couple years ago, and 1/2 of the comments on her You Tube video were complimentary (she’s cute/hot/pretty etc.) the other half … were about her freakishly large hands. I honestly never noticed them in college (except for one pic on her MySpace profile) but I guess when you have a crush on someone you tend to overlook their flaws!

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